lizblackdog (
lizblackdog) wrote2006-08-18 01:47 am
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Is this all a game? Was this all a ruse?
Holy fucking shit these fucking kittens are going to be the fucking DEATH of me.
I have just spent an HOUR AND A FUCKING HALF searching my flat for an orange and white kitten.
Spike couldn't find her (but I had him searching the wrong room so not his fault. He tried.) Cassie's too busy yowling for sex to care. I searched the cupboards. I searched the fridge. I turned the dog couch upside down in case she'd managed to crawl up into the springs. I was starting to think about prying the side panel off the bathtub. I even looked out-fucking-side, and she'd have to walk through walls to get there.
I'd reached the point of praying out loud with TEARS running down my face when she casually strolled up behind me in the bedroom, yawning and obviously just having woken up from a nice long sleep while I'd been imploding and the other three had been crackmonkeying around the flat.
I still don't know where the fuck she was.
I need a fucking drink now.
...and am now praying out loud with gratitude, for the record.
I have just spent an HOUR AND A FUCKING HALF searching my flat for an orange and white kitten.
Spike couldn't find her (but I had him searching the wrong room so not his fault. He tried.) Cassie's too busy yowling for sex to care. I searched the cupboards. I searched the fridge. I turned the dog couch upside down in case she'd managed to crawl up into the springs. I was starting to think about prying the side panel off the bathtub. I even looked out-fucking-side, and she'd have to walk through walls to get there.
I'd reached the point of praying out loud with TEARS running down my face when she casually strolled up behind me in the bedroom, yawning and obviously just having woken up from a nice long sleep while I'd been imploding and the other three had been crackmonkeying around the flat.
I still don't know where the fuck she was.
I need a fucking drink now.
...and am now praying out loud with gratitude, for the record.
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When I had the kittens, those two would scare the living hell out of me. Once, they disappeared for almost two DAYS. I unhinged the bed (where my German Shapherd liked to keep them) and turned it all apart, I tore apart every drawer, every cabinet, &c. --You know what I mean. Mind you, I was in a large studio. There were no other rooms.
Little shits were in the corner recess behind the claw tub--or at least that's where I finally found them--happy as clams playing with spiders. Pounce! Pounce! Pounce! Out they came and looked at me as if to say, "Okay, we're done with that. What's for dinner?"
I totally feel for you.
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Cats understand that they are scary little evil creatures, they know they can upset you and they understand how you feel.
They just don't give a fuck.
NO wait. That was my ex-husband.
Sorry.
;-)
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I saw, on Funniest Home Videos, this cat who squirmed under the bathroom door...there wasn't enough room under there for a mouse, and he slid right under it with no problems at all.
I STILL haven't found all of Julius' and Giddy's hidey holes.
Wonder what they'll do to me in the new place?
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Then there's the time I came home from somewhere or other to meet Piper just sitting on the porch, waiting for me.
Piper is an indoor cat.
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One time, while we had a house sitter, he pulled this stunt. The house sitter looked and looked and looked. The cat eventually surfaced from under a blanket, in the CLOSED wardrobe....he'd opened the door, got in, the door had shut and there he stayed until he was ready and then he pushed open the door and came out.
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In such moments I wish I had goldfish instead of rats!
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