lizblackdog: (Brokeback Squid)
lizblackdog ([personal profile] lizblackdog) wrote2007-07-29 11:30 am

There's a million of 'em selling, and the buyers can't be found

I'm sure I had an idea, back there. And then I glanced at [livejournal.com profile] toft_froggy's journal for ideas about how to kill her wittily and topically, and got hopelessly distracted by Trajan's honking great column. I'm fickle that way. A really impressive great column can often keep me distracted all day.


...where were we? Ah yes. Impressive great columns. Specifically, emails about impressive great columns, ostensibly from fetchingly-named people such as Pentagram L. Waterproof, Windmill K. Verbiage, Autumn V. Parham and Carla Couch. What poor [livejournal.com profile] toft_froggy didn't know was that all of those were cunning aliases for Ruthless Archvillain Me, and that as she chuckled over the silly names in her spam folder, the subliminal messages embedded in the subject lines were working away in the parts of her brain so obscure that they don't yet have scientific names. Yes, I'm that good. And I won't go into details, in case of upsetting the sensitive (is anyone sensitive still reading this?) - but her death by combined hoodia, revolutionary new herbal supplement and cialis overdose, in combination with the contact poison from the forty-eight replica Rolex watches... well, let's just say it wasn't pretty.

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