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Still not dead, though deathtired is kicking my arse despite increased thyroxine dose. I just wanted to post a book excerpt to show someone and so that I don't forget it.
THE CONCEALMENT
When a baby enters its mother's womb it first swims through the River of Forgetfulness. Only the Founders escaped this immersion. As they travelled to their mothers they floated above the water, in the silver air of truth.
If the Founders always knew reality, why did they wait to begin the Revolution? The answer to this question is: even the Founders (in beauty and truth live their names forever) must wait for the proper moment. The Revolution could only begin in its correct place, Anaheim, California, and only at the correct time, the Parade of the Animals. Before that moment the Founders knew they must not reveal themselves. They lived normal lives, going to school, working, living with their families and friends. And they made sure never to meet each other. For if only two Founders were to stand in the same room, or sit on the same bus, or even work for the same company or shop in the same department store, the light would leap from one to the other, blinding anyone who stood between them.
It happened once that a certain woman received a vision of the Revolution. She learned that the Founders existed, that one day they would join together and create the world. Now, this woman had suffered greatly in her life. Her father had died in a plane crash. Her mother had become an alcoholic and a thief. Her lover had left her for someone else. Two of her best friends had committed suicide, while another had contracted a terrible disease that destroys the body. And every day in the woman's city people were beaten and murdered.
The woman decided the world could not wait for the Revolution. She began to pray, and to chant, and through her desperate devotion she stumbled her way over the boundaries into the deep territories.With clear sight she saw the faces of Maryanna Split Sky, Jonathan Mask of Wisdom, and Li Ku Unquenchable Fire (in beauty and truth live their names forever). And she knew—if she could bring these three to the same place, even to the same city, the Revolution would begin, despite their efforts to postpone it.
She tried one scheme after another: fake phone calls, trick letters, fraudulent invitations. She hired actors and detectives, she bribed policemen. Nothing worked. The three always slipped from her net. Finally she returned to her devotions, for she realised that even the Founders could not overcome the Living World. If she could touch that power she could force them to give up their concealment. She fasted and prayed, and after many months she understood what had to be done. There were several steps, all to be enacted in the right order and the right way. Three things overrode the rest. The operation would take five days. During that time she must not open the door of her house, she must not touch food, she must not fall asleep.
She cleaned herself and prayed once more for help. Then she began the operation. On the first day she heard a knocking at the door. A voice cried, 'Help me!' and then she heard a thumping noise, and an agonised cry, and the voice called again, more faintly, 'Help me!' The woman rose but then she forced herself back to the work. At the end of that day a red light glowed in front of her.
On the second day she heard a knock and then her mother's voice. 'Please let me in,' the voice said. 'I've given up drinking but I feel so weak. I need you. Please.' The woman stood up. She ran to the door. But then she remembered all the mothers and fathers who'd died of drink and all the children left alone. She returned to her concentration. That evening a yellow light filled the room.
On the third day her former lover appeared at the window. 'How could I ever have left you?' she said. 'Let me in. I want to stay with you forever.' But the woman thought of all the women and men whose lovers had left them. She continued. That evening a blue light filled the house.
On the fourth day her diseased friend knocked at the door. 'Please let me in,' he begged. 'I want to see you before I die. How can you be so cruel?' All day he banged on the door. She thought of all the sick people and she stayed where she was. That night a great darkness and a great silence penetrated the house and the land around it.
On the morning of the fifth day white light filled the world. It shook the houses and pounded in the Earth. All through the day she heard a roar, like a thousand voices shouting with joy.
In the late afternoon she jumped up and ran to the window. Buildings were shaking and trees ran through the air. About to turn back she heard a soft whimper. She looked down and saw a starving dog lying on the grass. She stood there, looking at the animal while the light surged about the building. She told herself, 'It's already started. Nothing can stop it.' She went outside and lifted the dog. As she carried it into the house, the shouting voices changed to a sigh and then stopped.
But the light remained. She closed the door and set the dog on the rug. She looked at the bones pushing their way through the folded skin. She lifted it again and carried it to the kitchen. She opened the refrigerator but the dog was too weak to take any food. 'Please,' she said. 'I'm not allowed to touch it.' The dog began to cry. She looked around her at the light that looked like it could tear the walls apart. 'Nothing can stop it,' she told herself. She reached in for a piece of hamburger meat and gave it to the dog.
As the animal ate, its body filled out. It became stronger and it grew, taller than the woman. Its jaws hung open as large as a doorway. When it closed them it had swallowed the light. As the dog ran from the house a greyness settled on the walls and the woman and everything around her. 'I haven't lost,' she said. 'I can still continue. I can start over if I have to.' But even as she spoke she fell back against the sink, exhausted. Her eyelids began to force themselves shut. 'Please,' she wept, 'don't do this to me. I didn't want it for myself. There's too much pain.' She fell asleep on the floor in front of the refrigerator.
In the woman's dream she saw Li Ku Unquenchable Fire. The Founder wore a red dress and silver shoes. 'When we come,' she said, 'we will not come to end suffering.'
'Then why will you come?' the woman asked.
Li Ku said, 'When we come we will come for something else.'
When the woman woke up she could no longer remember the three faces.
The woman's mother stopped drinking. The woman's lover returned to her. The woman's friend recovered from his disease and all her other friends became well and prosperous. But she herself had weakened her body by her efforts to end suffering. Though she lived a happy life she died two years before the Revolution. On the day of her death she once more saw the Founders, all gathered together in a vision. She wrote in her diary, 'Now I understand. I am the saddest woman who has ever lived.'
from Rachel Pollack's Unquenchable Fire. This is possibly my favourite book in the entire world ever.
THE CONCEALMENT
When a baby enters its mother's womb it first swims through the River of Forgetfulness. Only the Founders escaped this immersion. As they travelled to their mothers they floated above the water, in the silver air of truth.
If the Founders always knew reality, why did they wait to begin the Revolution? The answer to this question is: even the Founders (in beauty and truth live their names forever) must wait for the proper moment. The Revolution could only begin in its correct place, Anaheim, California, and only at the correct time, the Parade of the Animals. Before that moment the Founders knew they must not reveal themselves. They lived normal lives, going to school, working, living with their families and friends. And they made sure never to meet each other. For if only two Founders were to stand in the same room, or sit on the same bus, or even work for the same company or shop in the same department store, the light would leap from one to the other, blinding anyone who stood between them.
It happened once that a certain woman received a vision of the Revolution. She learned that the Founders existed, that one day they would join together and create the world. Now, this woman had suffered greatly in her life. Her father had died in a plane crash. Her mother had become an alcoholic and a thief. Her lover had left her for someone else. Two of her best friends had committed suicide, while another had contracted a terrible disease that destroys the body. And every day in the woman's city people were beaten and murdered.
The woman decided the world could not wait for the Revolution. She began to pray, and to chant, and through her desperate devotion she stumbled her way over the boundaries into the deep territories.With clear sight she saw the faces of Maryanna Split Sky, Jonathan Mask of Wisdom, and Li Ku Unquenchable Fire (in beauty and truth live their names forever). And she knew—if she could bring these three to the same place, even to the same city, the Revolution would begin, despite their efforts to postpone it.
She tried one scheme after another: fake phone calls, trick letters, fraudulent invitations. She hired actors and detectives, she bribed policemen. Nothing worked. The three always slipped from her net. Finally she returned to her devotions, for she realised that even the Founders could not overcome the Living World. If she could touch that power she could force them to give up their concealment. She fasted and prayed, and after many months she understood what had to be done. There were several steps, all to be enacted in the right order and the right way. Three things overrode the rest. The operation would take five days. During that time she must not open the door of her house, she must not touch food, she must not fall asleep.
She cleaned herself and prayed once more for help. Then she began the operation. On the first day she heard a knocking at the door. A voice cried, 'Help me!' and then she heard a thumping noise, and an agonised cry, and the voice called again, more faintly, 'Help me!' The woman rose but then she forced herself back to the work. At the end of that day a red light glowed in front of her.
On the second day she heard a knock and then her mother's voice. 'Please let me in,' the voice said. 'I've given up drinking but I feel so weak. I need you. Please.' The woman stood up. She ran to the door. But then she remembered all the mothers and fathers who'd died of drink and all the children left alone. She returned to her concentration. That evening a yellow light filled the room.
On the third day her former lover appeared at the window. 'How could I ever have left you?' she said. 'Let me in. I want to stay with you forever.' But the woman thought of all the women and men whose lovers had left them. She continued. That evening a blue light filled the house.
On the fourth day her diseased friend knocked at the door. 'Please let me in,' he begged. 'I want to see you before I die. How can you be so cruel?' All day he banged on the door. She thought of all the sick people and she stayed where she was. That night a great darkness and a great silence penetrated the house and the land around it.
On the morning of the fifth day white light filled the world. It shook the houses and pounded in the Earth. All through the day she heard a roar, like a thousand voices shouting with joy.
In the late afternoon she jumped up and ran to the window. Buildings were shaking and trees ran through the air. About to turn back she heard a soft whimper. She looked down and saw a starving dog lying on the grass. She stood there, looking at the animal while the light surged about the building. She told herself, 'It's already started. Nothing can stop it.' She went outside and lifted the dog. As she carried it into the house, the shouting voices changed to a sigh and then stopped.
But the light remained. She closed the door and set the dog on the rug. She looked at the bones pushing their way through the folded skin. She lifted it again and carried it to the kitchen. She opened the refrigerator but the dog was too weak to take any food. 'Please,' she said. 'I'm not allowed to touch it.' The dog began to cry. She looked around her at the light that looked like it could tear the walls apart. 'Nothing can stop it,' she told herself. She reached in for a piece of hamburger meat and gave it to the dog.
As the animal ate, its body filled out. It became stronger and it grew, taller than the woman. Its jaws hung open as large as a doorway. When it closed them it had swallowed the light. As the dog ran from the house a greyness settled on the walls and the woman and everything around her. 'I haven't lost,' she said. 'I can still continue. I can start over if I have to.' But even as she spoke she fell back against the sink, exhausted. Her eyelids began to force themselves shut. 'Please,' she wept, 'don't do this to me. I didn't want it for myself. There's too much pain.' She fell asleep on the floor in front of the refrigerator.
In the woman's dream she saw Li Ku Unquenchable Fire. The Founder wore a red dress and silver shoes. 'When we come,' she said, 'we will not come to end suffering.'
'Then why will you come?' the woman asked.
Li Ku said, 'When we come we will come for something else.'
When the woman woke up she could no longer remember the three faces.
The woman's mother stopped drinking. The woman's lover returned to her. The woman's friend recovered from his disease and all her other friends became well and prosperous. But she herself had weakened her body by her efforts to end suffering. Though she lived a happy life she died two years before the Revolution. On the day of her death she once more saw the Founders, all gathered together in a vision. She wrote in her diary, 'Now I understand. I am the saddest woman who has ever lived.'
from Rachel Pollack's Unquenchable Fire. This is possibly my favourite book in the entire world ever.
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