It's a blessing and a curse

Dear Squish,

While I very much appreciate your smoke alarm yapping, especially in light of the fact that Bournemouth Council have yet to install the promised electronic variety, I wish to hell you had an off button.

I'M COOKING. NOTHING'S ON FIRE THIS TIME, I PROMISE. PLEASE STOP NOW.

Good dog.

It's a blessing and a curse

Dear Squish,

While I very much appreciate your smoke alarm yapping, especially in light of the fact that Bournemouth Council have yet to install the promised electronic variety, I wish to hell you had an off button.

I'M COOKING. NOTHING'S ON FIRE THIS TIME, I PROMISE. PLEASE STOP NOW.

Good dog.