What went down in the flood

[lizblackdog]

Wedding Song.

It had to be done.

There's a common perception that true love is synonymous with happy ever after; that once you find The One everything is sunshine and puppies and rainbows until you both die, old and together, holding hands.

Even for those of us who do grow old together, that's such a load of destructive bullshit. True love is more like climbing Everest or swimming the Channel or walking across the Sahara. It's fucking hard and it hurts like hell; it strips away all your defences and breaks you into little bleeding pieces. And it doesn't confer a magical immunity to carelessness and fucking-up, either; in fact, it'll magnify your mistakes to the point where one moment of inattention or stupidity can end you.

But ask anyone who's been there and done that; it's worth it, and more than worth it.

Also? Bob Dylan is God.

Comments

[mcsassypants.livejournal.com]

I cannot tell you how often I've run into the "puppies and rainbow clouds" vision of love that a lot of my single friends have. The crazy thing is that they don't believe you when you tell them that you want to throttle the other person at least 5 million times a day (but you're still happy to see them crawl into bed with you at the end of the day) Or if you do mention it, they think that it means that you have some serious marital problems and are one step away from getting a divorce. And really, there's nothing you can say to change their minds.

Bah. That's all I've got. I'm still waking up.

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

Heh, yes - with one thing and another, I've had about six hours sleep over the last three days, and while I'm physically wide awake and twitching, my brain feels like clouds of dissolving confetti.

I often think that those couples who never fight are the ones who just never have anything to say to each other.

[mcsassypants.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I foolishly thought I could ride out this headache (that started last night) without painkillers. It's seriously clouding my ability to think. Stupid head. Plus Christina thought it would be funny to stick her whiskers up my nose this morning around 4am and then meow in my face so I could smell her breath. Evil cat.

[fara-shimbo.livejournal.com]

Hear, hear! I have a teenage niece who is desperate for a boyfriend and needs to see this...

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

Maybe she'll learn it. If she's lucky. I hope it for her.

'Twas brillig...

[(Anonymous)]

Heh... more for the past post than this one, but what the heck... A poor thing, I know... {BG}. As to the matter at hand... one thing about rainbows. you have to have rain. And the pot of gold is more for the looking than the finding...


CC


Twas midnight, and where Liz did doze
Slid fire so nimble in her brain
Not flimsy were her horrors old
And the old truths still weighed

She feared the matter lost and done
Though wars she fights, the sores still scratched
She feared the forgive word and shuns
Time's comfortous balm, pain's latch

She woke, her keyboard close to hand
Worn mind in anxious throe of thought
And tested she with the Enter key
That it be offered forth

And as she offered thought she could
The matter lost, it came again
Ran twisted through her wounded mood
And trouble all her gain!

One hug! And two! And many who
Had keyboard they did click and clack!
None left uncared her spirit's dread
And offered care they had

And did they slay the matter lost?
She come to terms, past dream to joy?
Not quite today, mayhap one day,
Though hope her spirit bouys.

Twas midnight, and where Liz did doze
Slid fire so nimble in her brain
Not flimsy were her horrors old
And the old truths still weighed

Re: 'Twas brillig...

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

Gold, indeed! Or at least, a leprechaun. I love you.

Re: 'Twas brillig...

[(Anonymous)]

Heh... standard response/ comments about lousy taste in certain specific male friends inserted for consitency... {G}.


CC

[ms-daisy-cutter.livejournal.com]

That's actually why I'm glad I'm single. I couldn't deal with being in that sort of emotional vortex, even in a relationship considered "good" by most if not all standards.

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

I can understand that. I don't regret anything, but I sure as hell couldn't do it twice.

[ms-daisy-cutter.livejournal.com]

I don't regret anything,

Oh, not to imply that people who choose the coupled path are wrong or deluded. Obviously you're happy you chose as you did, despite how difficult it can be. Just that it's not my own path.

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

Not at all. It's like childed vs. CF - the only wrong decision is allowing anything other than your own inmost heart to decide the question for you, or attempting to decide for others.

[lady-alethea.livejournal.com]

I've had more than one close friend, people who know Will and I as well as anyone can, who say "I want what y'all have," yet have absolutely no concept that it's hard work. Harder than hard... There's no guarantee you'll get it right even if you DO work as hard as you've ever worked before. There's just no predicting another person, even one you love enough to make the attempt worth it.

*shrugs* For me it is worth it. But I won't be doing this again. *smiles* Once has been more than enough. We've had our ups and downs, and there's no reason we won't be together another 12 years or more, but still. Once is enough.

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

Yes, exactly. If John were still alive we would still be together. And we'd still scream and want to murder each other on a semi-regular basis, and we'd both still be bloody impossible to live with. And he would still be the greatest thing ever to touch my life.

But hell yeah, I'm never attempting that again.

[ulva.livejournal.com]

In some ways it's true that every mistake is easily magnified but there's also the non-demonstrative joy of being able to share good and bad with someone. The sense that someone actually cares if you get run over by a car. That it's actually worth it putting some effort into cooking because it's not just an intake of nutrition and bulk to stop the stomach from rumbling. Well, you know.

Besides I'd never want puppies on my doorstep as a token of a happy life. I'd prefer an Everest actually. ;)

[lizblackdog.livejournal.com]

Yes. Yes, I do know; that's why I don't really cook any more. The pleasure's gone out of it with no one else to feed.

and yes, it is excellent.

[entorien.livejournal.com]

I agree one hundred percent! If you didn't have to struggle for love, there would be no reward in it.