Black Doggerel

I have committed fiction. It was rather like defusing a very complicated bomb with a ticking timer on it. I have just handed it over to the official bomb disposal expert, with no idea whether or not it will explode in her face, and an uneasy feeling that it probably will.

Therefore, I am getting drunk now.


In other news, I have discovered that Spike has actually damaged both his front paws. Both paws are damaged in the same place, on the biggest pad, just where the base of the middle and ring fingers would be if they were hands and not paws. I am baffled, but leaning towards the theory that he did it by being particularly bouncy on some sharp stones or gravel; either that or there was a patch of small pieces of broken glass in the park. So now I'm having to wrap two of his paws in gauze and socks before we go outdoors. His score so far is two socks lost and one destroyed.

Bizarre happening of the day: Took dogs out for a pee at midnight, and there was a young man on the pavement doing something with a laptop computer on top of the wall that surrounds ou building. Both dogs took one look at him and freaked. This never happens. He turned and spoke to me, and it transpired he was deaf. As soon as he turned, the dogs stopped freaking and started wagging. I'm thinking maybe it was his standing-still-fiddling-with-something that freaked them? People on pavements don't generally do that. I wonder if he has a livejournal?

( A small rant about supermarkets and annoying people )

- this rant was brought to you today by six chicken bones and the tail-end of a baguette.

In other dog news, would you believe me if I told you Spike was acting as a stooge for a dog-aggressive dog? I wouldn't either, but he is. Directly Underneath Me Neighbour adopted an adorable Jack Russell bitch at about the same time as Downstairs Neighbour Couple adopted Yellow-Dog Buster, the miniature Dingo. We often meet him on our walks and Spike and Squish are great friends with his first JRT - however, New Bitch goes into a screaming canicidal rage at the sight of other dogs, even from across the road.

The great thing about this is that Spike doesn't. He likes terriers and he loves bitches and he doesn't care that she clearly wants nothing more than to rip his kidneys out and wear them on her collar. So we do the thing where we retreat just far enough for her to stop screeching, and I get them to look at me while D.U. Neighbour praises her for being quiet and reduces the distance a little each time. None of this is prearranged - we just tend to take walks at the same time. Dog synergy, or something.