This is no time to start snapping any loud twigs.

[lizblackdog]

So my actual problem is this. I need to fill in a form explaining in detail why I disagree with the Department of Work and Pensions over the results of a recent medical examination. I know pretty much exactly what I want to say, since the DWP were thoughtful enough to include a point-by-point list of all the places where the medical examiner either made up answers to questions he completely neglected to ask me or ticked boxes that directly contradicted what I did tell him.

The trouble I'm having with it is that every time I try to DO it my throat closes up and my heart starts pounding to the point where I have to go and lie down till I can see straight again. Also I appear not to own a functional pen, which I'm aware ought not, for any reasonable person, to be any level of real problem.

I've got through the last few days using my old tried and tested tactic of pretending it's not happening. This never works for long.

Word of the day: Suicidal ideation. It's not in me to kill myself; I know this beyond all doubt. So I find myself not telling people how attractive the idea seems so much of the time, because I don't want to worry them over something I know I'm not going to do.

For anyone who's read this far, yes, I am VERY well aware that half my f-list is coping far better with far worse trouble. I'm just... people keep asking me how I am. People seem to want to know. Well, there it is.

Comments

[mcsassypants.livejournal.com]

Oh honey.

When I start to panic about something that SHOULD be simple (and I've had my share of things like that), I find it helpful to ask someone to sit with me while I do the task at hand. That way, instead of panicking and avoiding the dreaded task, i can talk it out, or make jokes or take a small break and the other person can help keep me on task. Were I in England, I'd give you a pen and help you out!

[goingferal.livejournal.com]

I've never had that strong of a reaction, but I sure am good at going into extreme denial of a need-to-do item that I really, really, really don't want to think about.

Is there a friend you can trust to help you go through the first few items step by step--often that will support me enough to do the rest without going into mental shutdown.

Paperwork, blargh! We hates it.

[mudshark58.livejournal.com]

The trouble I'm having with it is that every time I try to DO it my throat closes up and my heart starts pounding to the point where I have to go and lie down till I can see straight again.

Clearly not the right moment for the task, I'd say.

Have you tried addressing just one point, finishing that, and putting it aside? If you do that enough times, it's eventually reduced to being a simple matter of copying all the bits into one place and mailing it off.

Or you can just wait until you're fed up with having the stupid thing hanging around, pick a time when nothing much else is going on (turn off the phone, lock the door, etc., as necessary) and bash through it the best you can. Don't be afraid to rewrite a couple of times for polish.

I do sometimes have trouble with facing Official Stuff what Needs to be Done, and both methods have been known to work.

[grimprime.livejournal.com]

Have you got a local Citizen's advice bureau or something along those lines who could help you get started? Or possibly even a doctor or a nurse if the thought is affecting you physically?

I would also say that there may be someone at the DWP who could help, but they are pretty much evil incarnate.

Also might be worth getting a second opinion on the medical exam as well, as the examiner sounds like a bit of a jobsworth.

I'm sure you'll get through it

[gwenhyffar.livejournal.com]

Nonononononononono. Coping is personal. There's no interperson ranking. If you can't cope, you can't cope. That's all there is to it.

[montymark.livejournal.com]

Maybe someone can help out via the Internet? You can get your points across o that person, with all the emotion and panic and whatever, and they can turn it into a proper explanation.

If there's a time limit, and your mother is down with the flu, maybe that's an option? Hell, if you trust me enough with information like that, I'd say you send it on to me and I'll do my best tonight (after 9:30 my time, though...).

[randomyst.livejournal.com]

MY BROKEN BRAIN, LET ME SHOW YOU IT.

I know of very few people whose brains and hearts aren't broken in some manner or another. If I could break into mine, you'd see my battle scars. Big, raised, keloid things. Now, you posted and have gotten good advice too so I don't have anything to add.

[wirenth.livejournal.com]

i've got nothing useful to contribute, i just wanted to add my voice to this post in support and understanding.

*nod*

[bites-the-sun.livejournal.com]

If there's a branch of Welfare Rights where you are, you could try them - I believe they help people with appeals. Apparently they also have a message board where you can seek help: http://www.doonhamer.f2s.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=9&sid=da7cec06ed8c279c9ec4fe87da7532f9

[zoochica.livejournal.com]

I've got to agree with some of the above posters - there is no such thing as pain ranking. What matters is how your pain affects your life. I'm glad that you could share it with us.

I know exactly how you feel regarding starting that letter - and you know that I can relate to a lot of things you wrote here. I wish I had some more sound advice for you.

...but I do have one little bit: keep talking. Write in here and use this space to freely express and analyze. My journal has helped me learn about myself in so many ways; I hope that you can experience that same illumination.

*hugs*

[huntingdon.livejournal.com]

What's the cause of the fear? The complicated form? The points you want to get across? The fear you won't get the money?...

With DWP it's all about using the right words. Despite your bad experience with the CAB they are mostly professional - and have done an awful lot in recent years to train both staff and volunteers. The downside is that there tend to be long queues right now because of the recession.

I'm happy to talk you through the form at some point if you want. You could always do it in sections as well. Just try for the first question. Once that's done, try the next two and so on.

[orac-zen.livejournal.com]

You're Liz. You can do this.

[danasaur.livejournal.com]

Of course people keep asking you how you are. People wouldn't be reading your journal if they didn't want to know. Ontop of that, just because you feel as if another person's problems are bigger than yours doesn't mean that your problems aren't real and deserving of attention.

I don't have any actual advice regarding your real problem, though. I just hope everything turns out alright <3

[ghost07.livejournal.com]

I've got through the last few days using my old tried and tested tactic of pretending it's not happening. This never works for long.


and I thought I was the only person who did that! I have nothing to contribute but sympathy; however, I am now shaking because reading this entry has reminded me of something similar that I had BETTER stop avoiding or I will be in real problems.

I had managed to completely forget about it for three months now; I've only got 3 weeks left to fix it.

You are in my thoughts and prayers {{{HUGS}}}

[mbif.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this. I would be terrified, too. I wish I could do something to help, but... I know absolutely nothing about it. Good luck, hon!

[cottonmanifesto.livejournal.com]

what a fuckwad of a doctor.

[yesididit.livejournal.com]

happy birthday!